If Social Networks Were Your Boss

If these social networks were your boss…

Facebook would

-make you fill out 189 pages of paperwork before you’re hired
-tell you what a good idea you had, and then tell everyone else what a good idea he had.
-hype up the company’s training and support sectors, even those departments don’t actually exist
-hire you to take keep your talent away from competitors, and then park you in the mailroom (@hwande)
– pay you to badmouth your former employer to his current clients
-keep a file on you hundreds of pages thick that detailed your every move within the company
-tap your phone, just in case
-carefully file and store the contents of your trash bin.

Twitter would

-provide you with resources of people you should know and information that will help you
-keep internal meetings brief, very brief.
-throw trendy work parties that make everyone laugh
-put a ton of support behind charitable causes surrounding disasters
-never shut up long enough to let you get any work done

MySpace would

-have laid you off a long time ago.
-be a terrible reference

Digg would

-Respect your opinions and share them with others
-Send you home because of ongoing construction
-Pretty much keep you from doing anything productive, ever.

Google+ would

-Keep jerking you around about whether there is or isn’t an opening

Please feel free to add to this in the comments section!

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About inkstainedknuckle

I'm a social media specialist with a fresh outlook and keen sense of diction. The world is my walnut.
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